Shenanigans!

It’s Not A Kid’s Game Anymore!

Uncle Sam; What is it, doc?

Doctor; Sorry, Sam, I’ve got bad news.

Uncle Sam; Give it to me straight, Doc.

Doctor; You’ve got ‘shenanigans’.

Uncle Sam; Oh, no!

Doctor; Yes, it’s been going around. It’s infecting your Republican nerve ends with ‘Pluto-klepto-kaki-auto-itis’.

Uncle Sam; Is it……fatal?

Doctor; Some people can live with it, but it could kill you at any time, and certainly your democracy gland will die.

Uncle Sam; And the cure?

Doctor; Well, we used to have a vaccine- the press, but it’s been ineffective against this new wave.

Uncle Sam; so, there’ no hope?

Doctor; There’s always hope, but I want you to read the rest of the article so, I’ll tell you at the end.

Uncle Sam; Godamnit!!

So, yeah, we have a bad case of shenanigans. I’m afraid we’ll have to talk about it.

Now, you’re thinking ‘you’re talking like shenanigans is a disease’.

It is!

It’s a great word, and honestly, I love using it. But, it’s never been this applicable before.

When I was a kid, it was a TV game show, and a home board game. Kids went around a giant game board, facing questions, tricks or winning prizes.

But, tricks- mischief- is the least of it. Historically, it’s also meant ‘devious’, ‘secret’, ‘dishonest’ or’ maneuvering’.

And, what we’re seeing here is the unwitting infection of the US Republicans by shenanigans as a political disease.

In other words, they are up to the most outrageous hypocritical duplicitous bullshit in political history and it seems to be contagious- virtually every conservative politician who’s rich or racist is vulnerable.

When Joe Biden was president, Republicans ‘cared’ about the law. They assessed everything Biden did, all of it lawful and appropriate, as criminal actions.

Biden, though, did not have shenanigans, as Rep. Comer aptly displayed in his freakishly bumbled hearings.

But with Trump, we see him outright breaking the law every time he turns around, and they think it’s just fine.

He doesn’t just have shenanigans, he’s a source and carrier.

The Constitution lies in tatters. The 14th Amendment has been knocked unconscious- birthright citizenship, insurrection and Congressional legislative authority have all been ravaged.

And, the 1st Amendment is in the crosshairs.

Just as every single person with a brain cell who’s paid attention has been saying ever since Project 2025 went online, Trump and Republicans are dismantling the government and reforming it as a fascist Christian nationalist autocracy.

America no longer has a president.

We have a chairman/dictator.

Tell people whatever you want (however absurd- transgender mice??). Close down all the avenues where someone might be able to tell them the truth. Punish anyone who tells the truth. Promote the lies non-stop. Invent lies to get everyone talking about it so they won’t notice you picking their pockets.

And, this is just six weeks in.

Uncle Sam; Is it the shenanigans again, Doc?

Doctor; Yes, it is, Sam, but now it’s led to ‘Pinocchiosis’.

Uncle Sam; Oh, no! I can’t believe it!

Doctor; I’m afraid you’ll have to shower a couple of times a day with disinfectant soap.

Uncle Sam; Oh, for fuck’s sake.

Trump is the proverbial little boy who lies, and has to lie even more to support it.

The Giant Faucet, DEI pilots, Ukraine starting the war, there are almost 50,000 lies to choose from.

But, it’s not just the lying. And the grifting. And the fraud. And the bribery. And the- where was I? Oh, yeah- all of these shenanigans are just personal failings. They relate to him, personally, transactionally.

More importantly, it’s the new shenanigans- the laws he’s breaking that affect the entire government and all of our lives;

- Firing Inspector Generals (he can’t).

- Firing thousands of federal workers over loyalty (he can’t).

- Sending handcuffed immigrants on military planes to other countries with no notice (he can’t).

- Halting spending of taxpayer dollars approved by Congress (he can’t).

- Halting all scientific and medical research (he can’t).

- Shutting down all public health notices from the government (he can’t).

- Banning LGBTQs from the military (he can’t).

- Demanding to take over Greenland (he can’t).

- Demanding to take over the Panama Canal (he can’t).

- Demanding that Canada become a US state (they would never).

- Destroying the Social Security workforce (he can’t).

- Eliminating Veterans aid (he can’t).

- Launching bitcoin with federal dollars with no authorization from Congress (he can’t).

- Selling ‘dinners’ at his resort for $1M and one-on-one meetings for $5M ( bribery much?).

- Manipulating the market by placing and rescinding pointless tariffs on Canada and Mexico (it’s a goddamn crime).

This doesn’t even get around to the fact that he was indicted for 88 felonies, including espionage, and convicted of 34 for election fraud. This is new criming.

That is some record-breaking shenanigans right there.

And who is there to stop him?

Congress?

Republicans are down with and busy normalizing all of these batshit acts.

Democrats are in the minority, and are avid and vocal in their opposition, but we never hear them, to the extent that many people don’t think they’re doing anything.

Why?

Because most of the mainstream legacy media is up to their own shenanigans, parroting and normalizing all of this. Trump’s new press secretary, we’ll call her ‘Lying Shill #5’, goes on TV and lies through her teeth at virtually every single question, and the New York Times calls it ‘unflinching’.

I know.

This is why we can’t have nice things.

We’re under a fascist attack, against our laws, our lives and our liberty.

There is only one way to defeat it before it becomes a military situation.

Public outrage.

Doctor; See? I told you we’d get to it.

Uncle Sam; Well, thank God for that!

Republicans are in it for the gravy. Either they’re getting a piece of the action, or they fear losing their seat. Either way, they won’t do shit for the people unless the people threaten their jobs. They get their cues from the media.

Likewise, the media is in it for the ratings. They get their ‘piece of the action’ by propagating the lies. (Yes, I used that word intentionally.) They will only change if it affects their bottom line, by losing subscriptions and advertisers.

Or, by gaining ratings.

This is our power.

Uncle Sam; But, how can we use it?

Funny you should ask.

Everyone should love the irony here. ‘Hoist by their own petard’ comes to mind.

All of the media outlets meticulously track their web data, their clicks, their searches, the subjects, the ad responses, the frequency of particular users- all of these actions play a part in their choice of coverage, even their choice of narrative.

We for instance, don’t hear much about what’s going on from Rep. Jamie Raskin, en eloquent speaker, a Constitutional expert beyond reproach, and often the most scrupulous and focused person on the Committees he’s served in.

All we have to do is search for Raskin from the search bar on the article that pissed us off. The system will record that a search came from that article for that person.

It’s a numbers game. Whatever the numbers show directs the narrative. If large numbers of people are searching for Democrat’s responses from Trump articles, it will filter through the stats and they’ll start talking to them, and the more frequently questions come up, the more chance they’ll ask it.

So, from an article on Trump’s firing of Inspectors General, search ‘Raskin IG firings’. Even if it finds no articles- it can’t- they never ask him- it will still record the search. Enough people do it, someone will notice it in the stats and have someone call someone who knows someone at Raskin’s office. They’ll have lunch.

This is literally how it works for them. (Well, not always the lunch, but probably.) CNN has justified going right wing precisely off of this kind of data.

So, it’s, you know, the irony thing again. They are using AI to track us and if we do this it trains the AI to push democracy.

For example, the more times we search ‘Trump kills democracy’, the more it will come up in the menu drop-down when you type just ‘trump’. If enough people do it, everybody will see it. If enough people see it and click, you get the idea.

Pretty nifty, huh?

This is exactly how and why right wing trolling works.

Twit-X ffs, is wired this way for pro-trump, anti-liberal priorities. But, google and media websites can be ‘trained’ by us, passively.

The main thing is that the truth of the current criminal shenanigans we’ve cited above is not being properly shared by the top media, and the voices that would do so are being stifled.

Media through the 1950s was still pretty conservative. They were behind the God and Country mantra, but they still showed McCarthy for what he was by televising his hearings live. And when the civil rights and anti-war movement combined with the younger generation’s music and art, and that mindset became the national consensus, the media went ‘hippy’ and proudly wore the ‘liberal’ label almost instantly assigned to them by Nixon.

So, that’s the Achille’s Heel of the media. (Metaphors were on sale. I got there late- this was the last one.)

Ratings is their weakness. And now, because of their narcotic dependence on them and the ubiquitous surveillance of our habits and activities, we can tell them what we want. Every day. Just by doing what they want us to do- click and search.

Uncle Sam; So, you’re telling me we can just surf and search for shit we want, they’ll know and give us more of it?

Doctor; Well, Yes.

Uncle Sam; And then the press will cure my shenanigans?

Doctor; Along with a strong Constitution and regular exercise of the right to vote, yes.

Uncle Sam; Geddafugouttahere.

We can collectively force the media and Republicans to do the right thing by making the wrong thing unprofitable and luring them with ratings and vote-influencing actions.

Mostly, we have to acknowledge that the Democrats are on the side of the good guys, and we need to lift them up by sharing and spreading the word. And that means fooling the media into letting them talk.

I know, you have questions, concerns, ideas you want the Democrats to pursue, criticisms of things they’ve done or positions they’ve held, and you want them to justify or explain. We get it.

So does the right. MAGA pundits love to bring up liberal criticisms of liberals, and lump them in with their fabricated ‘talking points’, and all it does is spread more shenanigans.

Left and center voters seem unaware that their dissent with the final candidate naturally splits the Democrats, and that no such self-examination occurs on the right. This is how Trump won both times.

Nor do they fully understand how their criticisms are warped and amplified to make the Democrats look worse.

Every time someone says that the Democrats are weak because they didn’t ‘fight back’ by doing this or that in the face of massive criminality by Republicans, they diminish both the Dem’s effectiveness and the seriousness of Trump’s crimes.

Republicans just use those points to further demonize Democrats and to claim vindication for Trump.

You see, ‘Pinnochiosis’ is indiscriminate, and the sufferer will lie about anything, however absurd.

Valid criticisms have their place, but right now the focus has to be on stopping this outbreak of shenanigans.

Like we said above, this is some serious Christo-fascist criminal shit right here. The law, the Constitution- the very fabric of the Union, is under attack and taking casualties.

And, any political doctor will tell you, curing shenanigans without the press vaccine is rough.

Everyone- show up online and say so with your clicks and likes and searches and hashtags and all of that digital shit that they follow like ants to a picnic. (That one was only $1 at the checkout counter.)

All of us who are wise to the shenanigans must prompt the media to admit that they’re wise to the shenanigans and start talking about it like there’s shenanigans.

Uncle Sam; So, if I do all of this, it’ll cure my shenanigans?

Doctor; If you exercise like you did in 1964, 2008 and 2020 it will.

Uncle Sam; And, the ‘pluto-klepto-kaki-auto-itis’? And the ‘Pinnochiosis’?

Doctor; Yes, but you have to be careful, they can recur.

Uncle Sam; Will I still have Republicans?

Doctor; Yes, you’ll always have Republicans.

Uncle Sam; Godamnit!

Doctor; But they won’t always have shenanigans.

Uncle Sam; Well, that’s a relief! And my democracy gland?

Doctor; It can be restored.

Uncle Sam; Oh, thank God!! Thanks, Doc, I owe ya.

Doctor; No charge, just try to keep that nutcase RFKJr outta my hair.

Uncle Sam; I’ll do what I can.

Doctor; I understand.

[fade-out]

Featuring;

Uncle Sam- Harrison Ford

Doctor- Wilford Brimley

Director- Ken Russel

Choreographer- Wild Man Fischer

Did we say ‘shenanigans’ enough times?

Okay, one more time- shenanigans!

C.2025 Cousin B